The Dark Pt. 2

So, this happened.

What are we looking at here? This is the scene I came home from work yesterday to find. This is my bed. The large reddish-brown thing bottom left is what’s left of the baked clay plate I burned the sage on. The smaller reddish-brown things strewn about on my bed are pieces of said plate.

Now, okay. The logical explanation is that Rufus did this. It makes sense, right? Except it doesn’t. The plate is THICK. At least half an inch. And hard. It’s baked clay, like a tile. And glazed. And WTF?

I checked his teeth. His teeth are fine. How are his teeth fine if he spent the day shredding baked clay?

Boyfriend says that Rufus is my demon. Which doesn’t really make me feel better.

I picked up what’s left of the plate and burned sage on it again last night, on the table to the right of my bed. On the table left of my bed, I burned that guardian angel candle for a solid three hours. And I read the prayer on the back, which asks for specific protection against “the demon.” I read it aloud in English. And then again in Spanish.

And then I gave sleeping with the light on a go.

No night terrors, but I woke up at 3:51 to a loud noise in my head and then again at 4:55 to what I thought was my vibrating phone. I don’t think I need to tell you that both times it took a good while for me to fall back asleep.

Boyfriend comes tonight to share the bed with me for two blessed nights. Think I can trick him into staying forever?

This entry was posted in F is for Fear, G is for God. Bookmark the permalink.

6 Responses to The Dark Pt. 2

  1. Courtney says:

    Maybe Rufus is your daemon, not your demon, like Lyra and Pantalaimon. It would explain his separation anxiety. Hope you get some restful sleep soon!

  2. Courtney says:

    When I was a kid I was sure there were giant red spiders that came out of my walls when I went to sleep. I was terrified they were going to bite my feet. Not the rest of me, just my feet (I don’t know why either, but I was eight and who can explain the rationale, or lack there of, of an eight year old?). I solved this dilemma by wearing socks to bed. Turns out these giant red spiders can’t bite through cotton! Booyah! Take that spiders!!!

  3. Love that! Making up your own rules to win your own game. I wish I were conscious when these things happen so that I could do that!

  4. Mandy says:

    I am terrified to be home alone. I check closets, under the bed, the laundry room, etc. And the fact that I am a crazy makes my dog a crazy, because he can sense my crazy, which makes for a lot of beagle barks at our condo front door (which, by the way, you must enter at least two locked doors to get to). When I’m alone, I just worry. I worry someone will come in and get me and my dog and then I freak. I even have an escape route, which includes jumping out a second floor window.

    For a long while I sabotaged relationships over being scared to be home alone. Thankfully, at 27, I’ve gotten better at talking about this. My fiance now understand that I’m not being controlling when I say I don’t want him to go to the bars with friends when it’s dark out. Instead, I’m scared. And of course, he still leaves. Life would be horrible if he never did.

    I wish you lived in my city, because I think we are a lot alike and would have a good time talking about our brand of crazy (please don’t take offense to that…everyone has a brand of crazy). Plus, our dogs could be friends.

  5. Kathleen says:

    Alright, that is creepy!

  6. stocktoc says:

    You wake up and your head feels like it’s buzzing, right? I’ve woken up to loud noises that weren’t there, the sensation that I couldn’t breathe, and plain and simple…my own racing heart. Then I start having chills, body aches, and nausea, and I lie awake for hours waiting for my body to relax again.

    I also sleep with the lights on (and our two big dogs on the bed) when my guy isn’t home with me. This is a habit I picked up during his deployments, when I also learned I had an adult-sized fear of the dark. And a bigger imagination than I’d thought, because I started seeing things in every corner of our house.

    I’ve been having these night terrors off and on for the last three years now, and only recently, when I refused to go back on an SSRI, I found some relief through a couple of (non-antidepressant) prescriptions and an amino acid supplement. Ask Sarah to forward my email I sent to her this weekend…if you’re interested. I know one solution doesn’t fit all, but I am greatly relieved to finally hear from a doctor that harsh prescriptions aren’t my only solution, and I’m anxious to share what I’ve learned in hopes that it’ll help somebody else who suffers from these awful things.

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