So this month I’m deviating from the usual format of my blog, which is to post about a random topic when I feel like it. Which means that I’ve written four entries in the last month, and all of them have been about being afraid of my dog.
When my lovely friend Kathleen tweeted that she’d signed up to do this thing called reverb ’10 (they don’t use the apostrophe, but I do because I’m all correct like that), in which, I guess, you spend the month of December reflecting on the past year with the help of daily prompts, I felt compelled to do the same. I like how Adventy it is, and I’ve been missing a lot of church lately for weekend trips to Austin to see Boyfriend, so I’m a little starved in the respect. And also I like reflection; it’s good for the soul.
2010 was rather good to me, so I’d like to give it some offerings in the hope that 2011 will be good to me as well.
Prompt: One Word. Encapsulate the year 2010 in one word. Explain why you’re choosing that word.
I read this prompt while I was still in bed this morning, seconds after my alarm clock had gone off. The first word that popped in my head was “better.”
Admittedly, I was still floating toward consciousness. As I woke up a little bit more, I decided I didn’t want to use the word “better.” It’s so competitive. And not very descriptive. It’s a superlative of “good,” arguably the least descriptive word in the English language. So I thought about a, um, better word. I thought about it while I jogged and while I took a shower and while I sipped my coffee and while I dried my hair and while I put on makeup and while I got dressed and while I drove to work. But there is none.
2010 for me was about feeling better, doing better, being better.
My best friend got me a mug at the beginning of the year with the following someecard on it.
I started the year on antidepressants. After a little while I felt better, so I was finally able to make some hard decisions that have all changed my life for the better, like starting a new relationship and a new job.
Then I felt so much better that I decided I could quit the antidepressants. My happiness took a slight dip, but I felt more like myself. I realized that off the antidepressants I needed to work even harder to feel better, so I began the deliberate process of making better decisions. To that end, I’m working daily to become a better person, a process that mostly involves loving better. Loving others better, but, to that end, loving myself better.
I started the year on antidepressants, and I’m ending the year off them. I’m better. Not ALL better. But better.
Now, imagine it’s one year from today, what would you like the word to be that captures 2011 for you?
I’m ready to take my betterness out into the world and see what it has to offer me. I’m open to more, even bigger changes. I’m excited to see what 2011 has in store for me.