Prompt: Body integration. This year, when did you feel the most integrated with your body? Did you have a moment where there wasn’t mind and body, but simply a cohesive YOU, alive and present?
I’ve spent most of my life being too inhibited to move my body to music in front of other people. I always preferred sitting down and watching everyone else. Even when all my friends would get into one of their dance circles (we were, after all, on a dance team), I would stand self-consciously in the circle for a bit and then wander off when a satisfactory amount of time had passed. But something shifted in 2010. Maybe it’s part of the blessed process of becoming more comfortable in my own skin as I age. Maybe it’s because I’m dating a boy who likes to dance. Maybe it’s just that I’m happy.
Whatever the case, I danced a lot this year. At weddings, at parties, in my apartment. Hanging on to Boyfriend’s shoulders as he slings me around. Wiggling my own shoulders to the beat. Shimmying up and down while a girlfriend shakes it behind me. Kicking out my boots in a row of people, holding on to an imaginary cowboy hat. Grasping my dog’s thick, furry waist, his scratchy paws on my shoulders. In every one of these instances, I didn’t question or think or worry or criticize. I just moved.